I feel selfish writing this post.
Especially since it was just yesterday that I talked about surrendering my wants for what God wants.
And I hope you don't think this posts means I'm not still trying to change my heart. I am.
But, as I was reflecting on this past week this afternoon; what I've committed to, what I've changed, what I've learned, what I've failed at... As accomplished, motivated, encouraged, and intentional I've felt this week. I am also feeling overwhelmed.
This is a lot of changes.
It's been a change for me mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.
And although I love the 'new groove' I'm developing in my day with newly added 'God time' in the morning and regular exercising, I'm starting to miss the time I used to waste.
My desire is to live more intentionally, and I'm missing my unintentional time only a week in?
But I think it's normal, when you are making a major life change to experience a moment when you feel uncomfortable and want to retreat back to what's familiar and normal. It reminds me of when I graduated high school and moved to college. I was so excited to finally be on my own and have complete freedom, but there were always days where I just wanted to drive home and have mom do my laundry, fill my gas tank, and make me dinner.
What did I do when I had those feelings back then?
Sometimes, I sucked it up.
And sometimes, I drove back home.
So, I'm going to allow myself to waste sometime each day. It might be 20 minutes of Pinteresting, it might be two hours wandering around Target or blogging.
But in an effort to be as "intentional" as possible about "wasting time", I am making myself a few rules:
1. Set time frame: I have to be to bed by 11:30pm. To some people that's crazy late, but coming from a night owl who typically goes to bed between 1-3:00am regularly, 11:30pm is early.
That means whenever I begin my 'wasting' time I have until approximately 11:20-11:25pm. I could start at 11:00 or 9:30, that will depend on Rule #2.
2. Completed to do list: I have a list of what I'd like to accomplish each day. It's more of a guide than a definite list (some things are rolled over to tomorrow and many things not listed are also done). But my rule is that before I 'waste time', I have to everything in site that needs to be done, done.
That means if I can see a basket of laundry, a full diaper pail, dirty dishes, or messy toys: I do them first. If I can't see the un-made bed, messy diaper bag, or unfolded socks: I don't worry about it. (I realize this is a pretty non-chalant but my ultimate goals is to spend 5-45 minutes of time 'working' in order to earn my 'waste' time.)
3. Both babies are sleeping: It one thing if they are playing while I'm cooking or cleaning during the day, but I don't want ignore either child just to because I feel I'm mentally 'clocked out' for the day. (I plan to go more in depth on intentionally parenting this month)
So, do you have 'rules' for yourself on wasting time? What do you have to complete before you allow yourself some?
Thank you following along on our journey to simplicity. Please be sure to learn about our family, like our page on Facebook, and visit the right column to subscribe to our posts :)
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want."